Claustrophobic
by casualtymybae
Summary: How will Cal and Ethan cope when they get stuck in the elevator during work. while stuck Ethan discovers something about his brother he never knew about. Can the team help when things take a nasty turn for Cal and will Ethan cope with watching his brother fall apart around him.   *This story will include mentions of mental health issues throughout the story* xxx
1. Whats Happened

Ethans POV:

I just finished with a patient and started to head back to the elevator when i bumped into Caleb.

"Nibbles how are we?" he asks in his usual happy voice. I shrug my shoulders as i slowly walk away. He runs to catch up and stops me in my tracks.

"Ethan whats wrong?" he starts o look concerned. I sigh as i look at him.

"Patient has just went into theatre with slim chance of survival." As i finish the lift arrives and we both walk in. Pressing the ground floor the doors close and the lift begins to move. Suddenly the lift comes to a halt and lights go off. As Cal yells i explain whats happened.

"No need to freak out Caleb. All that's happened is lift has broke down and lights have gone. They will fix it and we will be moving again soon. Whats wrong?" I look as he starts taking deep slow breaths and sits down with his head between his legs. I press the emergency button and dial Alicia's number into my phone and wait for her to pick up.

Alicias POV:

I was just sitting in the staff room on break when Ethan rang me. As i answered he sounded serious.

"Lift has broken down and lights are completely gone. We have pressed the emergency button but need someone here asap as i think Cal has started to have a panic attack." he hangs up not even waiting for me to respond. I find Elle and explain what he has just told me as she heads off to find someone to fix the lift.

Ethans POV:

Back in the lift i kneel down to Cal and try to get his attention. "Cal. You okay mate?" He shakes his head. "Whats going on? Cal talk to me im worried about you." i say as he lifts his head slightly. Shaking and sweating he talks quietly. "I never told you before but i suffer with Claustrophobia which can cause me serious anxiety issues. Its never really been a problem so i never said anything. Ethan i need to get out off here!" his voice breaking from where he was trying to keep it together. Just then a bang on the doors as we hear people outside trying to get us out. I just hope they can get us out before Caleb has a full blown panic. There is only so long i will be able to keep him calm for.


	2. Getting Out

Calebs POV:

I feel like i cant breath. Its like the world is stuck on fast forward and i cant keep up. My breathing is rapid and my heart feels like its about to explode out of my chest. I need to keep calm but i cant. I cant stay in control. As i fall to the floor i feel Ethan place his arms around me and support me down. I hear people above us as they try to get us out. I need to get out of here. Suddenly i jump at the sound of Ethans phone ringing. He answers to Alicia.

"Hey Alicia. Hows it all going?" he asks sounding desperate. Never has he seen me like this. I'm his big brother. Tough nothing phases me and now that gone.

"We are getting there but its going to be another 15-20 minutes. Is he doing okay?" she asks worry clear in her voice. As Ethan turns to me he just say "hurry up" and hangs up. As he explains what Alicia said on the phone i feel myself going more into a panic then ever before. I cannot survive another 20 minutes in here. I need fresh air. I need to get outside now!

I close my eyes and pray time goes faster. I focus on my breathing. Deep breath in and out, in and out. When out of nowhere i hear a thud! suddenly doors begin to open and i see two people reaching hands out to get us out. Its Jacob and Charlie. As Charlie helps Ethan out Jacob take my hand and helps me up. I climb out and head straight to the front doors. As i reach the doors i push them open and collapse to the floor. I cant stop myself and go into a full blown panic attack. Ethan races out after me and calls Max for a bed. As he arrives they place me onto the bed and straight into resus where they begin to give me oxygen and try to control whats going on. I don't like this All the people around me and i panic again. Pushing my way out of them i stumble losing my footing and fall straight onto the equipment smacking my head. As i lay on the floor blood surrounding me i feel myself getting m,ore and more tired as i drift off into sleep...


	3. Stitches

Ethans POV:

As i rush over to help Cal i notice the bleeding on the back of his head. Rolling him onto his back i keep one hand onto the wound as Robyn helps me transfer him onto a bed. Placing a gauze over the cut i stat to clean and dress the wound before grabbing the needle and thread and begin the process of stitching him up. Nearing the end and 12 stitches later i see Caleb starting to stir as he wakes up. Sitting down next to him i start talking to him to try and find out what is going on.

"Cal? How you feeling mate?" I ask concerned as he just groans in response.

"Head hurts. What happened? Why am i on this bed?" he asks me groggy and confused.

"You pushed away as we were trying to help you and tripped hitting your head. I've had to stitch up the wound and we are keeping you here for observation. What happened? You've never freaked that that when getting treatment before." i ask trying to understand whats happening with him. Sighing before he responds Cal begins to tell me something i never knew about him before.

"Claustrophobia Ethan. That's whats wrong. I've never said anything before because its never been a problem at work. But then again never did i think i would be trapped in a lift at work! As for just now i freaked out because i was surrounded by too many people. I didn't mean to push away it was just a reaction i had." He takes a pause as he looks back p at me awaiting my response to all this.

"Why didn't you tell me all this Cal? I could have helped you" He just shakes his head in answer to me.

"I just want to go home now Ethan" As he stands up and makes his way back to the flat." All i can do is stare as my big brother helplessly leaves the hospital.


	4. Only Mum Knew

Calebs POV:

As i arrive back at the flat i collapse onto the sofa. I feel tears starting to form in my eyes. Why did this happen? I haven't had a panic attack like this for years! Ethan didn't need to see that. He didn't need to know about my mental health. Only mum knew about this. I just want mum back. As i break down i fall to the floor and clasp my hands to my face. I don't hear Eth arrive home but i feel someone embrace me into a hug. I'm to tired to fight and let him hold me. I cant stop crying. I cant help it. As i breath and calm down he talks.

"What happened back there Cal? Why didn't you ever tell me any of this?" He looks at me waiting for an answer.

"I never wanted you to know. How would people treat me if they knew. People can be cruel Ethan!"

Sitting back on the sofa Ethan gets us both a drink. Something strong is needed after today. As Ethan joins me he takes a look at my head.

"Stitches look fine. How is your head?" he asks trying to change the subject. I appreciate that. He knows when i don't want to talk. Nodding in response i down th drink in one and say I'm off to bed.

"maybe you should speak to someone Cal. You need to face what happened today." I spin round anger building in my face.

"NO! I DON'T NEED TO SEE ANYONE ETHAN!" and with that i slam the bedroom door shut. Throwing myself onto the bed i take in what he just said. How could he? I don't need to speak to any professional because there is nothing to talk about. Why cant he understand that. I have dealt with this by myself all these years and that exactly how this will continue. I can control this. I have to...


	5. I'm Fine Ethan!

Calebs POV:

Sitting in bed i hear Eth get up and walk towards the kitchen. Do i face him? Its been 2 days since i have been home and i could count the times I've left my bedroom on one hand! I don't want to leave. I like it here, i can control what happens here. But I've got to leave at some point i guess. Throwing the covers back i step out of bed and slowly make my way out and into the kitchen.

"Morning Caleb. How are you?" Ethan asks me. He's trying to act normal but he is so bad at it.

"I'm Fine Ethan" i respomd as i grabsome toast and start to head back towards my room.

"Cal?" he calls me to get my attention. I turn as he asks me something i wasnt prepared for.

"Have you thought anymore about speaking to someone?" all i can do is stare at him in disbelief. Did he not hear what i said to him before.

"Nibbles i said I'm not speaking to anyone! I dont need professional help. I can handle it." i look at him as he sighs.

"Caleb you can't. You're way of handleing it has been to lock yourself away. Thats not going to make you any better in the long run though is it. You need to speak to someone professional who can help you. Counseling or meds maybe"

I couldnt believe what i was hearing!

"NO Ethan! I'm fine. Okay just fine!" as i stop talking i feel my chest getting tighter. My heart starts beating quicker and quicker as everything starts to go blurry and finally everything goes black...


	6. Back To Hospital

Ethans POV:

Hes arguing with me. I think he needs help but Cal wont except it. Next thing i know he hits the floor unconscious.

"Cal?" i see no response as i rush to his side and check pulse and all vitals. Pulse is going back to normal but still no response from him. I grab my phone as call 999. As i wait for the ambulance to arrive i try to get Cal to come around but with no luck. 5 minutes later there is a knock at the door as i hear Jez and Iains voice.

"Ambulance service" Jez calls.

"Doors open guys. We are in kitchen" i shout back as they enter the flat.

"Ethan? Oh god Cal! What happened?" Iain asks as they hold his head still and dp all the standard checks on him. I explain what happened just before the collapse.

"Personally i think he got himself all worked up and it caused him to panic more then finally passed out."

Placing him onto the stretcher we make our way into the ambulance and head back to the ED. On arriving we head straigjt into resus where Connie and Robyn greet us.

"You know i love seeing you two vut not like this" Robyn says sarcastically which makes me laugh a little. I think that was her intention though. Just as we start to move him onto the bed Cal starts stirring.

"Caleb?" Connie says repeatedly tryung to get his attention. Eventually he opens his eyes to realise where he is. Closing his eyes again its clear that he doesnt want to be here any longer than necessary. We stay for a cpuple more hours for Connie to keep Cal under observation. As time passes Connie pulls me to the side.

"Ethan I'm worried about how Cal is coping since what happened in the lift. This isn't just a case of him being claustrophobic. Something has happened before and its been pushed back to the front of his mind beciase of what happened in the lift. Any ideas?" she looks at me hoping i have the answer.

"Connie i didnt even know he was claustrophobic. If something happened to him when we were younger i have no recollection of it." I'm annoyed at this becuase i want to help him. Why wont he just tell us whats wrong.

"In that case Ethan i have no choice but to admit him into the hospital and call Psych down to talk to him. I can't have him go back home becuase you cant always be there and i dont want him on his own incase something else happens." she looks at me clearly upset atthe decision she has had to make.

"I agree Connie. We just now have to tell Cal. You admit him and call down Psych and ill talk to him. Its better coming from me" as she walks out of resus i brace myself as i know he isnt going to react well...


	7. Telling Cal The News

Ethans POV:

Walking over to Cal he sees that something isn't right.

"Whats going on Nibbles"he asks as i rack my brains trying to find a way to tell him what is happening.

"Cal there is some news i need to tell you but you need to promise to stay calm okay?" i look at him as he just stares at me in confusion.

Calebs POV:

What possibly could he need to tell me that's so bad? I nod as he begins to tell me what Connie has said about Psych. Fear and anger builds up inside me.

"You said that's a load of rubbish though right? Right Nibbles!" i say hoping he agrees with me.

"Actually i said it was a good idea Caleb. You aren't being yourself. You say you can cope but you cant cope. You need help and they can give that to you."

I cant believe what i am hearing. How could my own brother do this to me! I don't need admitted to hospital and i certainly don't need no Psych assessment. I place my had back onto the pillow as i try to take in what i have just been told. Psych is ridiculous. I don't need them. I don't need to be here and i wont. I just need them distracted. Connie calls Ethan to the nurses station to speak to him and as he leaves i know this is my only chance to get out of here. I cant be here. I pull back the duvet and climb out of bed. As i make my way out resus i hide away from Connie and Ethan so they don't see me. Making my way out the front door i run as fast as i can. Who knows where i will go but i need to get away. They wont help me. They cant help me. The only way i am safe is by being alone. I'm not safe around them, around anyone.

Connies POV:

As me and Ethan wait at the station for Psych to arrive we talk about how Cal took the news and what steps will be taken next. 5 minutes pass as psych arrive to evaluate Caleb. We tell them where he is and decide its best to leave him alone with them. To many people isn't a good idea. As we wait we see the psych assessor come back out.

"Where exactly is the patient? No one is in the bed" she say as our jaws drop and we rush into resus.

"Oh god. Ethan where could he have gone?" I ask as Ethan looks just as much in shock as me. The psych assessor looks at us.

"By what i have been told we need to find him now as from what he has been like since the incident any unnecessary stress may cause a psychotic break." As she finishes myself and Ethan rush out into the dark to try and find Cal. What is he thinking? Where could he have gone?


	8. Search Continues

Ethans POV:

Myself and Connie leave the ED in serach of Cal. Where could he have gone? I knew he wouldnt have taken the news well but i didnt think he would just leave the way he did. My first thought is the flat. Driving back home i unlock the door as me and Connie begin to search the flat top to bottom for him but with no luck. I dont know how Cal thinks, where can he go. A person cant just disappear. He has to be somewhere. As we get back in my car i place my head on the steeing wheel and let out a sigh.

"We will find him Ethan" Connie tells me reassuringly.

"Its not that. I'm sure we will but what if we dont find him in time. He can do pretty stupid stuff when he isnt thinking straight." i explain to her.

We drive around for a bit trying to see if either of us spot him but he isnt anywhere. I dont care about Psych or admitting him anymore, i was just need to see he is safe.

"He said your mum was the only person who knew why he had Claustrophobia. Maybe he has gone to the beach where she passed? You spread her ashes there right" Connie asks. Then it hit me.

"No he's been like this since we were little kids Connie! You are on the right track but wrong person. Me and Caleb didnt know anything about the adoption till recently which means when he is speaking about mum knowing why he is claustrophobic he is talking about Matilda. We dont need to go to the beach to find him becuase he will be with Matilda. He felt closer to her in the house we grew up in. If anywhere he will be there." with that i start the car back up and head back to the old house...


	9. Finding Caleb

**Im so sorry i have been gone for ages! I couldnt get into my account for the longest time but i am back now**

*For The Purpose Of The Story Caleb is 5 Years Older Than Ethan Not 2 Years Older*

Ethans POV:

I drop Connie back at the ED, telling her this is something i need to do alone. She nods and tells me i need to get him straight back to the ED when i have found him. As i drive towards the house all i can think of is whats going on?why is he like this? I search my brian for a reason but nothing. Pulling up by the house i see mums bedroom light on. I knew he would be here. No one lives here now, abandoned. Which we honestly like as it means we can come back whenever we want. Walking inside felt weird. I havent seen any of this is years. Mums coats/shoes. All her ornaments. Headong up the stairs i pass me and calebs old rooms and head towards mums. I open the door and sit myself down next to him.

"Connie was going to go all the way to the bay! Knew yiu would be here." i try to speak to him but with little success. He grumbles in response before finally talking.

"You think I've gone crazy Ethan?!" he says refusing to look at me.

"No i just dont know whats going on Caleb! If you actually told me why you are acting like this then maybe you would find that i would understand." i tell him as his head turns towards me tears forming in his eyes.

"No Ethan. Its not something you want to hear. Yes i have my reasons but they arent as black and white as you think they are." i look at him stunned at the person in front of me. Cal is the strong one. Nothing phases him and yet he is reduced to tears from this simple conversation.

"How do you plan to deal with it by not talking. You know as well as anyone not talking makes it worse Caleb. I dont care how bad you say it is. Im here, not going anyway and neither of us are until you say what the hell is going on!" i say getting slightly more annoyed. Closing his eyes he takes a deep breath and turns to me.

"Fine Nibbles. You want to know then okay. This is why i am the way i am, but i warn you it isnt pleasent" he says as he begins to explain all...


	10. How It All Started

Ethans POV:

I sit looking at Caleb as he takes a deep breath. Finally he is going to actually explain where all this started. Maybe now he will let us help him. I hope he does. He cant cope on his own. He has already proved that.

Caleb POV:

"You dont remember much Ethan because you were so young. It happened when you were only 3 and i was 8. Dad wasnt a nice guy. He believed in harsh punishment. Whenever i did something wrong he loved being able to punish me. There were several things that he would do but one of them he did regularly and it was his favourite because it caused me more emotional damage than it did physical and thats what he thrived on. Mum never knew what he was like till i was 10 and told her. Thats why he left suddenly. She told him to either leave or she would call the police. For not calling them he left and stayed out of our lives. What he would do is up in the attic we had an old set of chest of drawers that used to belong to nan before she died. When i misbehaved or what he said was misbehavior i would have to go up and lay in the drawers until he let me out. I could be there for hours but he just told mum i had gone out with some friends."

"She believed him?" Ethan asked shocked.

"Well yea. Nibbles even if she didnt she is hardly going to think im in a set of drawers in the attic is she! Look the point is i know i need help. But this isnt an easy fix and i need to do this alone. Please just let me do this alone." Before he could say anything to me i get up and slowly make my way out of the house and back to our flat. I need to be alone right now.

Ethans POV:

Sitting in shock i cant believe what i just heard. I mean it explains the claustrophobia and why he hated being around dad. But how did he do this for 2 years without mum knowing. Something isnt right. I mean i believe what dad did is the truth but as for mum not knowing. No. I dont believe that. She knew something. Call it an instint but Cal is still hiding something and i will find out what...


	11. Back At The Flat

Ethans POV:

I arrive back at the flat hoping to talk to Cal again. Upon opening the door i cant seem to see any sign he has been here. No jacket, no shoes. I then hear the shower start up as i realise he was probably in his room. Sitting in the living room i have time to refect on everything he said. I know he was telling the truth about dad,that i know for sure but with Caleb when he lies he gets sarcastic and he did that when i questioned him about mum. Something else is going on. She may not have been involved but she knew something. Why won't Caleb let us help him. I text Lily to tell her to let Connie know i have him back home and will be down tomorrow to the ED.

*Hey Lily. Could you let Connie and the other know i have Cal and we are back home. Will pop by tomorrow and expalin everything but i need to stay with him at the minute*

As i sot quietly watching TV i hear the shower stop. As Caleb walks out the look he gives me tells me he isnt ready to talk.

"Cal I'm not going to push you to speak about it but when you are ready then I'm here" i say reassuringly as he nods to me before emtering his room. Next thing i know my phone pings a text through.

*Hey Eth. Glad you have him home safe. We were all worried. Look forward to seeing you tomorrow.*

As i place the phone down i ask Cal if he is hungry. Upon him amswering yes i head to the kitchen to start making tea. I need to know what he is hiding but at the same time if i push him to much he will close up completely and we have already came so far. I guess i just need to wait till he is ready to talk some more...


	12. Explaining To Everyone

Ethans POV:

I didnt see much of Cal last night. He showered ate tea then just went to bed. This isnt like him at all. This has really shook him. I need to find out everything. I can't help him otherwise but he is very good at bottling things up. Problem is he bottles it up so much that when he does give in its like an explosion of anger, upset and every emotion you can think of all in one go. I walk into Cal room quielty to find him still asleep. Writing a note i leave it on the side of his dresser and head out of the flat.

*Just heading down to the ED to see the guys. Be back soon*

As i arrived at the ED i am immediately greeted with the hussle and bussle of the hospital. Patients and doctors running around i almost forgot what it was like. I head into the staff room where everyone is waiting for me. Lily gets up to hug me as i sit down next to her and let everyone know he is safe.

"He's asleep in bed at the minute. I didnt want to wake him so i just left a note for him" i say.

"You dont think he will leave again then do you?" Robyn asks as i shake my head.

"So what happened?" Max looks at me asking what i know they are all thinking. Taking a long breath i start to repeat everything Cal told me back at the house. Throughout the story i could see faces change and jaws dropping. Even Lily who normally doesnt ahow much emotions was in complete shock about what i was saying.

"Only thing i dont get is our mum" i say as Lily looks at me confused

"What about her? She didn't know anything Cal said" Connie said before anyone else.

"He says that but i just dont believe that this could happen for that amount of time and she didnt have even just a feeling something was wrong. I think there is more to it. I dont know what yet but i will find out" i say as my phone rings. Looking at the caller ID i see Cals name.

"Hi Cal. Did you see the note?" i ask as i hear his breathing is bad.

"Eth get home now. Hes here, in the house. He has a knife. Get the police and ambulance here NOW!"

"Wait Cal slow down, whos at the house?" i ask scared. The staff just listen on in horror.

"Its dad" Cal says. Next thing i know i hear a door kicked in and fighting begins. The line drops dead...


	13. Please Not Cal!

Ethans POV:

Dropping the phone i dial 999 for the police. As i explain over the phone whats just happened i grab Iain amd jez amd head out to the ambulance station. Hanging up i tell Iain to get to our flat asap. Lights flashing we race to beat the cops there,the whole time i pray Caleb is safe. Dad is dangerous at ghe best of times but when he is angry you need to watch out. Arriving at the flat we notice police and SWAT are outside. Something bad had happened i know it has. Standing outside Iain and Jez go in to see what is happening. A policeman walks up to me.

"Sorry sir this is a crime scene. Please step back." he says trying to push me away.

"No my brother is in there so i need... Wait what do you mean crime scene. Whats happened?!" i say scared of what he might say next. The officer looks at me with sympathy in his eyes.

"When we arrived there were two males in the flat. One is on his way to Holby City Hospital now but unfortunately the 2nd male was declared dead on scene." Just then Iain and Jez race out of the house

"Get in the ambulance Ethan. One male is dead but he is covered up so we dont know who it is. Other is at the ED now but Connie wont say anything." Jez says as i jump back into the ambulance and head back to work. He may be a pain sometimes but he is my brother. I just hope its him in that hospital bed because if its dad i dont know what i will do...


	14. Meanwhile At The ED

Connies POV:

Jez, Iain and Ethan are heading back but the other ambulance has just pulled up with Cal inside. As he is wheeled into resus i read out all information to the staff so we can help him. He lays there just staring at the ceiling not listening to a word we say.

"Caleb Knight, 33 years old. Was involved in a fight at his flat which resulted in 2 broken ribs and concussion. Other male is dead at the scene from being hit over the head in self defence. Ethan is on his way in now" i say as we move Cal over onto a bed to check vitals.

"Everything seems normal just in shock" Elle says as we decide to move him to cubicles until Ethan arrives.

Placing him in a cubicle i explain what happened and that Ethan is on his way in now.

"Hes dead" is all Cal can say.

"Yes but it was self defence cal. Thats what police said anyway" i explain as he sighs a breath of relief. Just then Noel appears.

"They are hear . i have Ethan in the staff room as i thought you would want to talk to him first." he says as i thank him and head off to speak to Ethan...

*sorry its a short chapter, will update again soon*


	15. Telling Ethan The News

**i really appreciate all the reviews even if i dont reply all the time i read them all. This is the last chapter. If you want me to write a sequal focusing on Cals recovery then please let me know and I'll start one when I've updated all current stories xox**

Ethans POV:

Waiting in the staff room for any news felt like a lifetime but out of nowhere opens the door making me jump a good 20ft in the air.

"Sorry Ethan. Did i scare you?" she says in a softer tpne that you dont hear much.

"Its ok. Hows Caleb?" i ask. I had beenfilled in on the way here that it was dad in the flat and Cal was here.

"2 broken ribs and a concusion. We are lucky that was all. He is in cubicles now if you want to go and see him" she says as i nod and head over to see him for myself.

Opening the curtain i see him asleep as i sit down next to him and pray he is okay. Not just physically but mentally too. Just then he opens his eyes and greets me with a smile.

"Nibbles,you alright" he says as i burst into laughter.

"Me? You're the one that's been in a fight for god sake Cal. Are you okay?" i ask cpncern hitting my voice. He nods and then whinces in pain holding his side.

"Do you need some more pain relief i ask as he agrees and i call for . She bring back some pain relief and sets up a drip into his arm and then leaves us alone.

"You need to open up Cal. I cant help you if you keep shutting everyone out. We all want to help you." i say tears starting to form in my eyes.

"Dont start nibbles you know i cant stand tears" he says sarcastically as he pulls me in for a hug.

"I promise i wont shut anyone out ever again. I need help and i know that. No more okay" he says as i half smile through the tears and hug him back tightly. As time goes on Cal drifts back to sleep and just before i fall asleep in the chair next to him i smile softly again knowing that everything was going to be okay from now on...

The End


End file.
